It is now 5 days since I set up this blog and I have not written anything in it yet. I have been a bit despondent, and I am wondering where my studies are going. I did an NMC CHECKiT lab on Wednesday – the fourth I have done - and was very disappointed with my score. It seems that I am making no progress at all, despite spending large swathes of time in the lab. It is so frustrating.
I have been looking at my motivation for trying the CCIE. It is not for the money, and not for any immediate career advancement. I already have a job that pays reasonably well. I seem to perform my work to the satisfaction of the customer. My workplace is 12 minutes from home on foot. My contract that does not expire until 2011. If I passed the CCIE tomorrow, it would not make one cent difference to my remuneration, nor would it prompt me to go looking for a change. My motivation is entirely to do with interest in the subject, and a sense of achievement when I understand something.
Does a low score in a CHECKiT (or even in the real thing) really matter then? Yes it does, because a low score is a blow to the ego, and is terribly demotivating. For better or for worse, I have chosen the CCIE yardstick to measure my worth, and the yardstick says I do not measure up, nor am I making progress.
So, why do I get such low scores? OK, there is a lot of the stuff that I still do not know, and I am working on that. I can handle that. What I cannot handle is my apparent inability to read the questions and the general conditions. What I cannot handle is the stupid mistakes: mis-spelt (but consistent) VTP domain names, IP address dyslexia, and the like. What I cannot handle is the difficulty I have holding the whole scenario in my head as I read it through, and so to correlate requirements that are related. What I need is not so much time in the lab (although that would not come amiss), but some form of concentration therapy.
But the only way to go is forwards. I have a lab booking in May – my third attempt. If I don’t pass, I’m going to have to renew my written, ‘cos if I don’t do that my CCNP will expire. I hope I can get myself sorted out by then.
From a motivation perspective, I’m the same boat as you. I’m happy with my job. I make decent money; earning the CCIE designation isn’t likely to change my salary. CCIE for me is a personal quest. I want to as good as I can be, and CCIE is the top of the mountain as best as I can tell.
Comment by Ethan Banks — 11 Feb 2008 @ 13:02